strange state of mind

My mind has been a little weird lately. I try to sit, and gather my thoughts to be released in some type of clear, or at least semi-comprehensible way; only to be distracted, whiny, or irritable, or have a sudden on-set of ADD (my mind is just weird like that).

It's hard to accept that it's July already, and that the summer, as it is defined by school sessions, is over half gone. "Boo to that!" I say! Mayhap now I'll get some 'summer fun' in, since my hours at the park have been cut. But, it's better that than being without my good ol' park job!

Saturday we had our Fourth of July Festival here in the park. I love the festival ambiance, esp when I get to be in the background, or foreground, of things, working in an official capacity.

My accomplishments and adventures included

- making 4 clover flower necklaces and then passing them on to 4 very entranced little girls. They would come up to me with wide eyes and "Wow! How do you DO that?"
-controlling crowds of rowdy kids all eager to bounce to their hearts content inside an inflated bounce house
-creating grand balloon decorations
-being my generally friendly, helpful self

It was a great day despite being forced child control for the afternoon. We had a great fireworks show, and I got to play with my camera a bit. Molly and I cruised about in our golf cart, which has been long anticipated!

I'm feeling a bit introspective lately, but I'm not quite sure what to do with it. I've gotten out of the habit of journaling away my internal flights of fancy and dives into despair. There was a time when I couldn't go a day with writing pages in my un-lined journals. Ah well, something to explore in news ways!

How's all that for random bits? But then again, it's how my head it lately!

Monday Musts

1. Wash the dishes in my sink that I've been avoiding eye contact with.
2. Pull out my cloth and thread and sew something unrelated to my crazy quilt.
3. Revise and reformat resume.
4. Along those same lines, prepare cover letter.
5. >strike>Start WNCCL website banner in Photoshop. I've got ideas!
6. Listen to one new artist/album. [it's so easy to get in a rut of the familiar]
7. Do some yoga. Seriously, do it.
8. Print pictures for Kyle's mom.

Wednesday Serenade

For the 100th night in a row it's raining and thundering and being glorious. Okay, so it's not really the 100th night in a row, but there's a definite weather cycle going on that involves rain almost every night.
But still, I'm comfortable sitting on my couch, playing with my computer or whatever, and having my eye caught by the lightening back lighting and silhouetting the trees against the briefly white sky.

Anyway....this is my new favorite song!

Love is Love

Tortoise And Bonnie 'prince' Billy - The Brave And The Bold - 05 - Love Is Love.mp3

Self Promotion

I'm terrible at advocating for myself.

But, my summer goals are to increase my portfolio materials, and self promote what I'm good at.

Well, one aspect of all my greatness. :-)

Photography.

It's been something I've loved for a long time, and the past couple months I've been drawn back to it as a commercial thing (senior portiats, engagement photos, etc). So my project this summer is to build my network and connections, make an excellent online portfolio, as well as informational packats, and take lots of pictures! Be they of friends or strangers.

So, on that note, I would like to invite you all to my Facebook Page and my Website. Both are works in progress, but I'm excited about building both to reflect what I do and love.

Wee!

Wednesday Serenade

Well, it's rather dreary and wet here. It's good to get the rain, but it feels like we've had more rain days than sun days, and I prefer the sun days myself. But, when the realization that it was indeed Wednesday, and that I was actually remembering to do a seranade, I immediately thought about Singin' In The Rain! It's a musical comedy from the 1950's, full of the fashions, humor, dance and catchy tunes that make that era appealing to me.

Anyway, if musicals are slightly intersting, you should watch it!

Singin' in the Rain--Good Morning

Marriage, eh?

"Every day we're making this decision and this commitment anew," he says. "I'm not with you because there would be legal speed bumps to get through if we weren't. I'm with you because this is where I want to be."

Quote from Couples Who Don't Get Married, Time Magazine

First off, read the Time Article.

Now...

If that quote above expresses the attitude that was held going into marriage, or evolved once the excitement was gone, and selfishness and immaturity took the foreground, no wonder there is such a high rate of divorce. It's not surprising that marriage is looked at with apprehension and even avoided.

So, I started thinking about what marriage means to me, both personally and generally.

Marriage can't be a singular commitment. In other words, it must be proceeded by a proven commitment already in existence.

It is a daily decision and commitment. And not always based on passion or good feelings, but made nonetheless out of respect and the commitment that anyone makes being in a relationship.

It's more than a legality. It's a choice to participate and commiserate fully in my partners life, and to have that acknowledged by God and man.

I'll be the first to tell you that my views have been formed out of a Christian upbringing, in which marriage plays a strong roll. And it's probably obvious without stating the fact! :-)

Would Kyle and I be just as happy if were weren't married but just as committed? Possibly so. But we choose to make the ultimate commitment based on our love and desire to be in each other lives for all of time. This is it, this is our marriage, our relationship. Neither of us view it as a legality, or even a breakable bond. It's been the best thing ever for us both! Not a fix it, or even the next step, but an enhancement to our lives.

Some people are able to commit in a very deep way, perhaps negating out the legality of marriage for them. Perhaps they've been raised without marriage being a large part of their belief system or encountered something that repels them from the marriage model. I don't know. I'm not saying that everyone MUST get married based on my opinions.

Still, I think marriage is tending to have negative connotations. I find that sad, because I've found it to be the most glourious experience of my life!

Anyway...that's my tirade. Hardly logically or polished. :-) But I would love to see what you all have to think--agreements, disagreements, etc!

So much for that [Wednesday Serenade]

Hmm...I've sadly neglected poor Wednesday Serenade. I hope she forgives me....
So with appropriate humbleness, I offer a post-Wednesday-because-I'm-forgetful-Serenade!

It's almost summer which changes my musical tastes. Not so much changes, as makes me crave lighter, more acoustic sounds.

Bill Callahan (Smog)--Sycamore